Oh Lord, please don't tell me to stop
Did it again last night.
And I gotta tell ya, I kinda liked it.
No, that's not true - I really like it. That's why I did it again about half an hour ago - and my heart is still beating fast. And hard. Maybe too fast. And too hard. But if I die from it, at least I'll die happy.
What I do is, I wait until the wife and kid are out of the house for the night. Then I turn off all the lights in the living room, light a single candle so that people walking by on the sidewalk will still see my silouette on the blinds - and then I put an old record on the turntable. And dance. And dance like there's no tomorrow. Not only no tomorrow but no dawn and I couldn't care less if I even get to see midnight.
And luckily, most of those old songs are no longer than three minutes tops - because, my heart is about to pop by the end. And that's what the rush is. That's what the 'danger' part of this is all about. Some may call it 'suicidal' - I prefer to think of it as flirting with the Grim Reaper, When you're in your fifties, this is what's known as living on the edge.
Yeah, I hear your giggles. But I dare ya, anyone out there who's forty or even thirty or what the hell, even 17. And I double-dog dare ya to fill your arteries with cheese and burger-grease and first-hand smoke and half a distillery of Canadian Club and then get up there and do what I do - dance like a maniac, dance like that chick in the leggin's from 'Flashdance,' dance like ya mean it, dance like your life depends on it; dance like you're on 'Soul Train' and not some piece of shit like 'Dancing With the Stars'; dance like at that very moment there is nothing more important in the world because you are in tune with the universe and you don't give a damn how stupid you might look ---- and then live to tell the tale.
Or better yet, record the whole thing and put it up on YouTube for'Posterity.' Because that's what I do.
The first time was a couple of weeks ago. When you watch the video, you can tell that I was a bit self-conscious. But at the time, it was like I was the life of the party - that is, if there was anyone there other than me and the dog - who mostly looked embarrassed. I got my kid's web-cam, closed the rec-room door , put on Otis Day and the Knights singing that ol' Motown classic, 'Shout,' and I tell ya, the magic just happened. For the curious, this is filed at YouTube under "Kevin Arnold Dancing."
I tried it again recently to an entire CD of greatest hits by Soundgarden. But it just wasn't happening.
But tonight, I thought I'd go for the gusto, push myself with an endurance test - and if Mr.Heart Attack was to show up, I'd mop up the floor with the mutha - if he could even hang in there as long as I planned to be on my living room boards, bopping round and round to a four minute song!
It wasn't an intentional idea on my part to pick out such a long song. But for the first time in a decade, I had a hankerin' for some Sinead O'Connor. And my favorite - and the only rockin' song she has - is 'The Emperor's New Clothes,' ... and that's all I need in the way of tunes to rock out to. And when you see me bite my lower lip real hard during the chorus? - I meant to do that.
... and when it's all over and you're waiting for your pulse to subside back to normal, the following song from that CD - 'Black Boys on Mopeds' is a good thoughful relaxer - and a reminder as to why this baldy-chick ever mattered in the first place.
But by all means, check out my dance interpretations of Sinead on YouTube. It's filed under "Your Dad dancing like Axl Rose."
And I gotta tell ya, I kinda liked it.
No, that's not true - I really like it. That's why I did it again about half an hour ago - and my heart is still beating fast. And hard. Maybe too fast. And too hard. But if I die from it, at least I'll die happy.
What I do is, I wait until the wife and kid are out of the house for the night. Then I turn off all the lights in the living room, light a single candle so that people walking by on the sidewalk will still see my silouette on the blinds - and then I put an old record on the turntable. And dance. And dance like there's no tomorrow. Not only no tomorrow but no dawn and I couldn't care less if I even get to see midnight.
And luckily, most of those old songs are no longer than three minutes tops - because, my heart is about to pop by the end. And that's what the rush is. That's what the 'danger' part of this is all about. Some may call it 'suicidal' - I prefer to think of it as flirting with the Grim Reaper, When you're in your fifties, this is what's known as living on the edge.
Yeah, I hear your giggles. But I dare ya, anyone out there who's forty or even thirty or what the hell, even 17. And I double-dog dare ya to fill your arteries with cheese and burger-grease and first-hand smoke and half a distillery of Canadian Club and then get up there and do what I do - dance like a maniac, dance like that chick in the leggin's from 'Flashdance,' dance like ya mean it, dance like your life depends on it; dance like you're on 'Soul Train' and not some piece of shit like 'Dancing With the Stars'; dance like at that very moment there is nothing more important in the world because you are in tune with the universe and you don't give a damn how stupid you might look ---- and then live to tell the tale.
Or better yet, record the whole thing and put it up on YouTube for'Posterity.' Because that's what I do.
The first time was a couple of weeks ago. When you watch the video, you can tell that I was a bit self-conscious. But at the time, it was like I was the life of the party - that is, if there was anyone there other than me and the dog - who mostly looked embarrassed. I got my kid's web-cam, closed the rec-room door , put on Otis Day and the Knights singing that ol' Motown classic, 'Shout,' and I tell ya, the magic just happened. For the curious, this is filed at YouTube under "Kevin Arnold Dancing."
I tried it again recently to an entire CD of greatest hits by Soundgarden. But it just wasn't happening.
But tonight, I thought I'd go for the gusto, push myself with an endurance test - and if Mr.Heart Attack was to show up, I'd mop up the floor with the mutha - if he could even hang in there as long as I planned to be on my living room boards, bopping round and round to a four minute song!
It wasn't an intentional idea on my part to pick out such a long song. But for the first time in a decade, I had a hankerin' for some Sinead O'Connor. And my favorite - and the only rockin' song she has - is 'The Emperor's New Clothes,' ... and that's all I need in the way of tunes to rock out to. And when you see me bite my lower lip real hard during the chorus? - I meant to do that.
... and when it's all over and you're waiting for your pulse to subside back to normal, the following song from that CD - 'Black Boys on Mopeds' is a good thoughful relaxer - and a reminder as to why this baldy-chick ever mattered in the first place.
But by all means, check out my dance interpretations of Sinead on YouTube. It's filed under "Your Dad dancing like Axl Rose."
posted by Sonny Drysdale at 4:49 PM
1 Comments:
Oh God, thank you!
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