On Chickens and The Coop

Come harvest time and the crops are in and the leaves have turned colour, a young man's thoughts turn to poultry. And sometimes Alice Cooper.

Particularly during the Thanksgiving weekend. Which coincidently marks the return of Alice Cooper to town. I'm taking the boy to the show. He's almost 14 years old and this is probably the last time he won't be embarrassed to be in my prescence at a 'Rock' concert for a few years.

Besides, Alice Cooper is as much a prerequisite to adolescence as 'Catcher in the Rye.' To that purpose, The Coop has been serving every generation since 'I'm Eighteen' from about 1973. Going to see 'Uncle Alice' should be a rite of passage. I'm sure my ol' man would have taken me but he was more into Deep Purp at the time and so we had a falling out about musical tastes back then.

To celebrate his arrival this weekend I am forgoing the traditional turkey holiday repast. Instead we are having the very trendy and newly popular Beer-Can Chicken, prepared on top the BBQ - as pictured at the top of this post. Yep, Ol' Milwaukee BBQ'd chicken, Stove-top stuffing with sausage - it's going to be a White Trash Thanksgiving!

As for chickens, they have never strayed far from The Coop's legacy. Even the free-range ones.

Two decades ago, back when I was interesting, I wrote about Music on a freelance basis for what was then a very-good daily newspaper. These days, the same paper is generally considered to be the worst daily in Canada. But people do remember when it had quality and I'm always grateful when a stranger comes up to me on the street and asks, "Hey - didn't you used to be Sonny Drysdale, that music writer guy at the Free Press?"

Here's an example of how good it was back then - I was a freelancer. They had their own staff 'rock' critic. But one day, on a whim, I asked the powers-that-be, "Hey, Alice Cooper is coming to town - can I do the preview interview?" The editor said yes.

The following is a portion of that interview from TWO DECADES ago. But like Alice himself, it's still current, just like why he's still important and a genuine icon - and why the kids still love this stuff.

We talked about the rumours. The one that he was Eddie Haskell. The about where he and Frank Zappa had a 'Gross-Out' contest on stage - who could be more grosser - and it starts with one of them dropping their pants and taking a shit on stage. The other guy out-grosses him by eating it. ... I've been to a few 'rock' concerts in my life, and I know that this story is just a lot of bullshit because no one stops a copncert to have a 'Gross Out' contest with the opening act. And because no one can move their bowels on demand.

But here's Alice's response to the other infamous rumour at time - that he had once bit the head off a chicken on stage (long before Ozzy and the bat story,) AND TWICE ON SUNDAY!!!

Never happened claimed Alice. "No, what really happened was, it was at a rock and roll festival years ago in Toronto. Somebody in the crowd threw a chicken onstage. And I'm from Detroit. I'm not a farm kid at all. And I saw the chicken, figured it has feathers, it has wings, it can fly away.

"So I picked it up and tossed it, thinking it could fly and it went into the audience and the people in the first rows tore the chicken to pieces.

"The next day, I'm reading the paper and I see 'Alice Cooper Tears Head Off Chicken and Drinks Blood.'

"And I've never gotten past that rumour. Which is fine. I've never denied it."

Happy Thanksgiving to all. I don't really care for the drumstick. Or breasts. But if you think of it, please save me the neck and the giblets.