It Just Never Ends
See what they have done? Look at what they have done to my Spanner Girl. Again. And again.
It wasn't enough to tear down an entire billboard devoted to the Spanner Girl this past fall and leave her ripped and scattered in pieces upon the ground.
This time, they have actually scaled the heights of the billboard and attacked her in her own home.
It has to be a pretty sick individual who hates the Spanner Girl and what she represents so much that they would go to all the trouble of climbing up onto a billboard platform twenty feet off the ground and then start tearing away at the very fabric of her stylish yet sensible and affordable winter outer-wear.
Not only that - but to do it TWICE!
The top photo is of the Spanner Girl at Springbank and Wharncliffe. The second photo is of the Ridout and York Street billboard.
Spanner Girl News Monthly, a newsletter published twelve times annually by the Sonny Drysdale Media Empire, is investigating the fact that both defacings have occured at billboards located right next to the train tracks.
S.G.N.M. has gone on record in pointing out that the site of the original Spanner Girl billboard violence - in which the entire billboard was ripped down and vandalized - was at the corner of Wortley and Stanley Street, mere yards from the CN railway line.
Due to the coincidental nature of the earlier attack and its proximity to the train tracks, S.G.N.M. investigators are considering the possiblility of the perpetrator being a transient (a.k.a. 'hobo') or a commuter who regularly travels the Windsor-London rail corridor.
Either that or someone who happens to live in central London and is just jealous of the Spanner Girl.
posted by Sonny Drysdale at 10:51 AM
14 Comments:
They're not even ripping down the good parts
Sonny, Sonny, Sonny. There's only one person in Tune Town that I know who fits the bill as Suspect #1.
Bert Downie.
I don't think the Spanner Girl has any bad parts.
Brent Donne only has bad taste. He's not a suspect.
Sonny,
I'm leaning toward your hobo theory, and will keep my eyes peeled during my walks into the historic downtown - though it certainly doesn't look historic when the fabric of Spanner Girl is torn.
Do you feel another ode coming on?
We could all use a good ode about now.
GAH
Sonny, Bert's jealous that Spanner didn't advertise in his stale-dated magazine.
That drives him beserk. Moreso when he's off the Ritalin.
FYI> There is another spanner girl billboard at Oxford and Clark Rd. It is actually a double sided/facing billboard. One side facing south, the other north. The south facing side is in the same condition as your photos but the north facing side is in good shape. Oddly enough, they are right beside the CN rail tracks BUT the trains blow through that crossing at speeds that are not conducive with some RailHobo defacing your sweetheart. My guess would be that they are made of inferior billboard material or at the very least, they have been installed by an inferior paper hanger.
Wind, inferior paper-hanging, natural causes - these are all excuses the cops tossed out when I called them in the case, Pops.
They also refused to investigate my 'hunch' that the Soviets were involved.
... Gordo - I've been inspired lately and am thinking of writing down some verse and titling it 'Ode to Obama' because that has a nice ring. But I can't think of anything that rhymes with 'Barack.'
Sonny,
Pesky Soviets - definitely a loose thread to pull at.
'Barack' is a tough one; sock (it to me) is all I've got so far.
So, I leave the ode it in your capable hands.
GAH
hmmm, Spanner girl slashes and ode to obama....
hows about,
Barrack the Knife,
On the sidewalk, one sunday morning
Lies a billboard, oozin life
Someones sneaking round the corner
Could that someone be Barrack the knife......
thanks Pops - but it doesn't rhyme with 'Barack'
I was considering a global/political sort of point/counterpoint kinda pome but I can't think of anything that rhymes with 'Obama' either.
anyway, thanks for the jumping-off point. Just like Billy Shakespeer, yer a poit but doan no it.
an' lots of luck to you and yers
There is a new Spanner Girl on Hamilton Road right near the Goodwill. She's wearing some nice summer wear, which the local druids and shamen have determined that summer will be five days early but will come with a plague of locusts.
The cultured folk round SoHo have too much good taste to deface Fine Commercial Art.
Nope, I'm thinking the perps are transients or someone right in my own neighbourhood.
Thanks for the update tho, Kid.
... I've noticed a few Spanner Girl ads promoting the Cruise/Resort Wear line too.
Bright colours this year in the swimwear dept. And it's about time.
I think your hobo theory has merit. Hobos are a crafty bunch. See John Hodgman's research on the subject.
Phronk - you might be onto something there.
There is a new Spanner billboard in my neighbourhood. Site of the previously mentioned vandalism.
Don't let it get around but I have it under 24-hour surveillence.
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